Match: v Hayes & Yeading United - Blue Square Premier
Date: Saturday, October 17th, 2009
Result: Hayes & Yeading 3 Cambridge United 0
The Journey
Departure Time: 10.30am, which on reflection may have been just a little early!
Arrival at Ground: Apart from the inevitable slow going in road works on a short section of the M25, the journey was straightforward enough and we arrived at the ground at about five to twelve. There was no problem with parking - especially at that time. A large sea of concrete, into which the Amber Nation gradually sailed, served as a more than adequate car park.
At The Ground
The Ground: The early arrivals were pleased to find a welcoming social club in a 1930s style pub to one side of this car park. Clad in the reddening leaves of Virginia creeper, this homely emporium contained a cabinet full of assorted trophies. As these seemed to belong to both Hayes and Yeading, the glass shelves bowed and creaked under their combined weight.
Looking across the car park, there is a small block of turnstiles in the left hand corner of the ground. Five red doors, set in yellow brickwork, grant access to the ground - three for home fans, two for visitors. A fence beside this construction is almost obscured by the trees and shrubs that prod and clamber their way through its chain links and, as a result, it looks more like the edge of some allotments than the boundary of a football ground. A single red turnstile door stands aloof at the other end of this fence.
Getting through away turnstiles was an experience for United fans. The lady operating one of them said 'Go!' each time she released the turnstile to allow anyone through, as though starting a time trial race.
The club is preparing for a move from Hayes to Yeading, but for the time being their Church Road ground is just the job for the gates they get and the level at which they play. And it's a sobering reminder of United's non-league status.
A small stand runs from about level with an imaginary point midway between the half way line and the edge of the penalty area at one end to a similar position at the other. Entry to this stand is via one of three red-painted metal stairways at the front of the stand; an arrangement that means that the lowest row of seats is a good ten feet above pitch level. Although the wide, metal girders that support the roof are at the front the stand, the building itself is set far enough back from the pitch to mean that they do not obstruct the view. At least they don't obstruct the view from the press box, situated at one end of the stand; apparently the same cannot be said about the view from some seats in the more centrally positioned Directors' Box - news that was greeted with a wry smile in some quarters!
However poor the view from some of the seats in the Directors' Box might be, they must surely be perfect in comparison with that from the two rows of seats at the base of this stand. Separated into two sections by the metal cage of the players' tunnel, one of these sections is directly behind the away dug out.
A small number of terrace steps are in front of a wide concourse of concrete to either side of this stand. This concourse hosts the tea bar, a shed from which programmes are sold and a small metal shipping container, perhaps from a small metal ship. This container turned out to be the club shop and was a veritable Aladdin's Cave of car boot purchases such as football-related videotapes, Subbuteo sets and board games.
The remaining three sides of the ground consist of a continuous bank of old-fashioned, but 'proper' terracing. Containing ten or a dozen steps, only the centre section along the side facing the main stand is covered by a roof. As this was a segregated match, gates were closed to corral U's fans into the open terrace at the car park (Church Road) end of the ground and about a third of the side terrace. This meant those who wanted to avail themselves of the cover of a roof could do so.
United Fans: Not the biggest away following of the season, but it still felt as though U's fans outnumbered the home supporters.
View from Away End: The steps of the terrace were steep enough and there was plenty of room in which to move around, so the view was good.
Home Fans: Scattered around the ground, it sounded as though the merger between Hayes and Yeading was not an entirely equal one with all the songs about the former and none about the latter.
Police/Stewards: It's been unusual to see police at an away game, so it came as a bit of a surprise when a police car and mobile CCTV unit turned up at about 1.45pm. They busied themselves making sure most people were searched as they went in. Some of the stewards seemed equally surprised to find the police assisting them in their duties, but all were unfailingly helpful, polite and friendly.
Programme: £2.50 for 44 pages. Lots of adverts, more than enough stats and enough articles to make it a decent programme. The featured player piece included a drawing of the player by a young fan and the match officials were welcomed and appreciated thus: "Today's match couldn't take place without them, we wish all the officials a pleasant stay with us today, invite them to make full use of our facilities and wish them a safe journey home after today's game". If there were space, it wouldn't surprise me to see that sort of message crop up in another programme at some stage!
Food/Drink: Dispensed from a caravan-style tea bar, there was a huge selection of catering available, including a plate of breakfast for £3.50. This was better value than £4.20 for a polystyrene tray of chips and a burger, with the latter inheriting rather too much of its container's taste.
State of Toilets: Dark but perfectly adequate.
Tannoy: The choice of music played over the tannoy was unusual, varied and quite cleverly done. The teams ran out before the match to Sham 69's 'If The Kids Are United', while the second half was presaged by the theme from '633 Squadron'. In the build-up to the match, the announcer referred to the player interview in the programme and then played that player's favourite tune.
The pre-match build-up also featured regular announcements counting down to kick-off time, rather like the build-up to a magical fireworks show at a Florida theme park. And indeed there were fireworks. Visible from the main stand, they could be seen early in the first half as some of the local residents celebrated Diwali.
Afterwards
The Journey Home: There was one final sight to enjoy before setting off for a mercifully short journey home. Dusk was starting to fall as we left the ground, and the crepuscular hour was the trigger for a large flock of parakeets to start roosting in the surrounding trees. Although the light wasn't quite good enough to be sure; we thought that they were likely to be the green, Ring-necked variety rather than Cambridge Ambers pining for the Fens.
Mileage: 127.8 miles
Total Distance for Season: 1,604.2 miles
Mark Johnson, with additional reporting by David Gray, Paul Johnson, Ryan Johnson and Gordon McMillan.
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