U's 0-0 Southport: Slow on the draw
Do you believe in ghosts? A spooky apparition appeared in the Main Stand today, a deathly pale, gloomy-looking creature with a shock of white hair which looked strangely familiar, as if it had come back to haunt a place it once knew well. Yes, it was our old friend John Beck, who is thankfully not dead, and was no doubt at the Abbey to cleanse his footballing palate after escaping from the Theatre of Chaos just up the A14.
Perhaps he was on a scouting mission for Premier Sports, the obscure satellite TV channel which has just added to its portfolio of top-level shinty, conkers, bar billiards and shove-halfpenny (I'm guessing here) by agreeing to show thirty Blue Square Bet Premier matches for the next three seasons, stating with Luton versus Grimsby next week. Well, they can't fall apart and leave us in the lurch like ITV Digital and Setanta… can they? And who needs the money, national exposure and quality of a BBC highlights programme, eh?
Whatever Beck was doing, he would have looked on approvingly as visitors Southport put on a display of basic Route One, hoof and chase football, a steady stream of long throws into the box and some Olympic quality time-wasting from a very early stage. Unfortunately, their hosts lacked the quality on the day to do anything about it.
Southport were regular opponents of the U's for United's first seven years in the Football League, even being promoted in the same season of 1972-73 and relegated with us a year later, but our ways parted on United's second promotion in 1977, the coup de grace being a 5-1 pounding at the Abbey thanks to goals from Jim Hall, Alan Biley and a Tom Finney hat-trick, and the Sandgrounders were booted out of the League a year later, Wigan Athletic achieving election in their place, as United went up again to the Division Two.
In all that time Southport only managed to defeat the U's once, 4-1 at home in the 1971-72 season, and they had no further luck when the clubs were reunited in the Conference in 2005-06, losing twice and drawing twice before relegation claimed them in 2007. The clubs' last meeting was a 2-2 Abbey draw on 24th February 2007, both United goals scored by Robbie Simpson. And what an odd-looking team we had then: Herbert; Bridges, A.Collins, Duncan, Morrison, Brown; Brady, J.Simpson, Pitt; R.Simpson, Chillingworth. Used subs: Page, Ademeno, Purser.
No-one can say United have not progressed since then. But we expect more, much more, and as we enter phase two of Martin Ling's cunning three-year plan, impatient fans are anxiously awaiting that all-important first win of the new season.
United line-up: Brown; Roberts, Coulson, Saah, Jennings; Willmott, Russell, Carden, Platt; Marriott, Wright.
Adam Miller had been due to start but injured himself in the warm-up, so Simon Russell was moved to the middle, Robbie Willmott withdrawn to the right wing of the 4-4-2 and Adam Marriott was drafted in to accompany Danny Wright up front. Wayne Gray, originally left out of the 16, was promoted to a bench which also included Daryl Clare for the first time this league season.
Southport, last season's Conference North champions and by all accounts such a direct side that they made the Crazy Gang look like the Mild Bunch, fielded a team devoid of household names, even in their own households, unless you count Robbie Williams, formerly of Accrington Stanley rather than Take That. Three of their number, however, had played in their last visit to the Abbey three years ago (Kevin Lee, Michael Powell and Tom Gray), with a fourth (Liam Blakeman) amongst the substitutes. They wore their away strip of white shirts and yellow shorts, unable to sport their attractive home strip of yellow and black halves.
On a humid but breezy summer's afternoon United got off to a lively start, Willmott shooting over inside the first sixty seconds, then setting up Wright for an effort wide a minute later. More balls in the box followed to no avail, and soon Willmott and Conal Platt had performed their customary switching of flanks, where they remained for the rest of the half.
On 9 United broke away quickly from a Southport throw in much the same vein as their first goal on Tuesday, Platt feeding Marriott, but this time his ball to Kevin Roberts, of all people, was just too near keeper Tony McMillan.
Two minutes later a half-cleared corner found its way to Wright, but he blasted disappointingly over from fifteen yards, and Roberts, haring forward on the overlap at every opportunity, shot ambitiously over on the quarter hour. On 17 Simon Brown gave the home supporters palpitations when he badly misjudged Ashley Winn's swirling free-kick and fumbled it wide of his far post for a corner, then Willmott set up Wright for a shot which was blocked by the huge figure of Earl Davis.
Every throw-in which Southport gained within forty yards of the United goal, on either flank, was launched into the box by long-throw specialist Matty McGinn. As his position was wide left, this meant a long, slow walk across the pitch for every attempt from the opposite wing, and the home crowd soon began to tire of the long delays which this occasioned. Southport were clearly in no hurry in their bid to hang onto the point they had at the start.
United continued to break forward brightly, but there was a distinct lack of quality in their final ball, to the amber hordes' growing frustration. Platt was unable to find Marriott on 24, and now their initial flurry had died down, the U's were finding it increasingly difficult to get behind Southport's stout two banks of four.
Wright ghosted past Lee on the half hour and went down just outside the box; Willmott stepped up to take the free-kick but arrowed it just wide. The busy Russell then set up James Jennings, whose shot was comfortably gathered by McMillan, but the contest was increasingly becoming a stalemate, slowed down by the visitors at every opportunity.
Three minutes from the break Gray turned and shot in the box for Southport and skied it when he might have done better, then Wright picked up the harshest of bookings for an aerial challenge on Lee, who reacted as if he had just been hit by a bullet from a previously unnoticed grassy knoll, ref Stewart as averse to physical contact as Ashley Cole is to keeping his trousers on.
The visitors finished the half with a flurry of long throws and corners which ended when Davis inexplicably lost his head in a scramble in the box and seemed to want to take on everyone in an amber shirt in a fist fight. He was deservedly booked.
It had been a mixed half for the hosts, who had enjoyed plenty of possession but had been unable to find that telling ball in the danger zone where it counts. Wright had led the line well, Marriott had been a little subdued, Russell had been everywhere while Paul Carden's form had been more variable, and the wide men had been busy without creating what everyone craved: a goal. Southport had battled hard and were doubtless more than happy with the stalemate.
There were no changes in either side for part two, but within two minutes of the restart Carden had withdrawn, having failed to shake off a knock. Sam Ives deputised, leaving United with an outfield ten whose average age was just 21, the only players over 23 being 25-year-old veterans Russell and Wright.
On 51 Willmott raced into the box, but he tried to beat his man rather than shoot and was blocked away. Three minutes later a half-cleared corner fell to Ives and he found Platt, who drove his shot against the bar and over. Best opportunity so far.
Willmott found Wright's head with a cross on 57, but he could not find the target, then Willmott was tugged back by Winn at the expense of a yellow card for the Southport man. The free-kick was in a similar spot from which Marriott scored in the last home game of last season against Hayes, but Willmott pulled rank and blasted it into the wall. Sometimes it was a toss-up what was more frustrating, Robbie or Southport.
That was underlined just after the hour when a magnificent control and through ball from Wright sent Willmott clear down the left channel, but although he was totally unmarked he took the ball too close to the keeper and his underwhelmingly scuffed shot trundled lamely wide of the far post. Wasteful.
A change was needed if the U's were to make that long-awaited breakthrough, and that meant the introduction of Daryl Clare for his U's league debut in place of Marriott. Within a couple of minutes Wright and Clare had combined to set up Platt for an unchallenged shot from just inside the area, but he proved to be just as frustrating as his wing colleague with a wild shot over the top with the entire goal at his mercy. Basic technique, son, head over the ball…
The visitors made a couple of changes, Paul Barratt for Gray and Blakeman for Powell, and they continued to try to slow the game down and hold it up as much as possible, McGinn continuing to traverse the field for his long throws at tedious length. That did not stop them from curling in challenging corners which continued to ask questions of a flailing Simon Brown.
Clare fell over hopefully in the box, but there was no danger of the ref awarding a spot-kick, then Davis won a header from a corner for the visitors than he should have kept on target. Back came United, but with any number of passing options available, Ives dragged an unwise shot wide. Brown then saved comfortably from Alan Moogan, and Willmott sent a free-kick into the box than evaded everyone. More frustration.
A quarter of an hour from the end Wright was withdrawn in favour of Wayne Gray, and his first contribution was a good run and cross which, inevitably, could not find an amber shirt. On 77 the man in black finally and belatedly took action against the timewasting visitors when Lee was carded for cynically knocking the ball away when his side won a free-kick, but the booking seemed a token gesture at best at this late stage.
United continued to press, Platt curling a decent shot wide of the far post, then on 84 they came close again when Russell found Ives on the edge of the box and the youngster's shot beat McMillan but pinged off the bar. Even more frustration.
Adam Flynn came on for Winn, Jennings had a free-kick blocked, and with 90 minutes ticking round, Brian Saah took matters into his own hands, or feet, with a brisk stride into the Southport half and a thunderbolt of a 25-yard shot which McMillan could only beat out, but Russell was crowded out from the rebound.
Four added minutes only scratched the surface of the dead time in the second half, but on the day the U's could have played another 44 and failed to score. Southport celebrated a hard-won 'ugly' point, in stark contrast to their 4-3 win at Kidderminster in midweek.
But what glass to use to view United's performance? A clean sheet, fine. Plenty of possession, lots of nice build-up play. But their final balls and finishing just were not up to scratch. Perhaps a fully fit Clare will rectify this; but football is an impatient game, and three matches into the season without a win is not a nice statistic. As a Cambridge man once wrote: Don't Panic. But feel free to worry all you like, until that first win is achieved.
Somehow one suspects that this was not the sort of thrill-packed, incident-filled goalfest which Premier Sports will be particularly excited about showing at Thursday breakfast time or whatever hellish timeslot they will be allocating to their new playthings. It certainly cannot compete with the much-vaunted Premier League, home of two more 6-0 thrashings for its smaller clubs today, one of which replaced Southport in the Football League in 1978. It's the hardest league in the world, you know…
Statto Corner
Daryl Clare has been a scourge of CUFC for the past four years, notching 6 goals in his last 7 games against United. His first two appearances, though, were goalless for the much-travelled hitman, as he failed to notch for Boston United in their 1-0 Abbey win on New Year's Day 2005 or for Crawley in their 2-1 away defeat in November of that year.
He started scoring, however, after he signed for Burton Albion. His first was in the Brewers' 2-1 home win in September 2006, and he repeated the trick from the penalty spot as they duplicated the score at the Abbey that December. The following November was blank for Clare as he was sent off in their 2-1 home defeat, but he bounced back with goals in both of Albion's playoff semi-final legs in 2008… to no avail as the U's advanced to Wembley.
Moving on to Rushden & Diamonds, he experienced a rare blank in a dour goalless draw at the Abbey in November of that year, but he had the last word for Gateshead with his first brace against the U's in the Heed's 2-0 home win last April. Time to start evening the score, Daryl…
Clare is the fourteenth player to wear the United number 10 shirt since squad numbering was introduced in 1999. How many of the previous incumbents can you name? They were all goalscorers, albeit of varying fortunes.
The answers: Trevor Benjamin, Ritchie Humphreys, Tom Youngs, John Taylor, Shane Tudor, Danny Webb, John Turner, Jamie Guy, Danny Carey-Bertram, Charles Ademeno, Lee Boylan, Jon Challinor, Danny Crow.
Sam Ives has now worn three different squad numbers in the last three years: 19, 20 and 17. He is far from unique, though. Other players to have sported different squad numbers in three consecutive seasons are Josh Coulson, Adam Davies, Ash Fuller, Ashley Nicholls, Shane Tudor, Robbie Willmott and Rob Wolleaston. Coulson and Willmott have now broken that sequence for themselves by retaining the same numbers this term as last.
But the king of them all was Dan Gleeson, who wore numbers 31, 20, 2, 25, 7 and 2 from 2003-04 to 2008-09, keeping number 2 last season. Part of the reason there were so many changes was his departure to Notts County in July 2006, and return to the Abbey as a loan player in March the following year, re-signing permanently two months later.
Player Ratings
Brown 6. Still not quite the commanding figure he cut last season, and plenty of room for improvement, but a clean sheet must help his fragile-looking confidence.
Roberts 6. Better than Tuesday, with a commendable zeal for getting forward, although his crossing really needs considerable improvement.
Saah 7. Commanding as ever and what a super shot late on.
Coulson 7. Got stuck in with gusto.
Jennings 6. Decent shift, did not get forward as much as we know he can.
Willmott 6. Robbie remains frustrating, with so much good approach play but so little end product, albeit that criticism could be aimed at the whole team today.
Carden 6. 'Enjoyed' a fairly mixed half until forced to withdraw.
Russell 8. The engine room.
Platt 7. Did not hit the heights of Tuesday, but plenty of good work and some near misses with that sweet left foot.
Marriott 6. A few good moments, but not as many as he or we would have liked.
Wright 6. Led the line solidly.
Ives 6. Adequate replacement for Carden, came closest to scoring.
Clare 6. Promising first outing with plenty of neat work. Add a little match sharpness and the goals will flow in due course.
Gray 6. Lively and energetic sub, made a good impression.
Match Summary
United lacked the wit or invention to battle their way past Southport's parked bus and time-wasting, with not nearly enough quality in the final third to defeat their unambitious but stubborn opponents. Lessons to be learned.
Man of the Match
Simon Russell. There was no dog on the pitch this weekend, but Russell's impersonation of a tireless, snapping terrier was a more than adequate replacement.
Ref Watch
Stewart 5. Far too fussy, awarding a succession of unnecessary free-kicks for the slightest of physical contacts, and one belated token booking for 90 minutes of Southport time-wasting was not remotely adequate.
Soundtrack of the Day
Blood Red Shoes "Heartsink"
Andrew's previous match reports
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