Tuesday 17th February 2009 - Kidderminster 1-3 U's: Aggborough agony aground
There are some things you think you will never get to see in your lifetime. Barry Fry getting lost for words, for example, or England winning a major trophy outside this country, or Celtic unveiling a new orange away strip, or Arsene Wenger one day saying "I'm fed up of all this pretty passing football - let's go Route One and win something for a change!"
For the average U's supporter, you could have added to that list a decent ref who controlled a game without cards but with a smile on his face, Paul Parker having something positive to say about our beloved United... and a win at Aggborough, home of our bogey side, Kidderminster Harriers, where we last triumphed in September 1959.
Today I am staying alert for the proverbial plague of locusts, or the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, or at least Private Frazer to loom out of the mist crying "Doomed! We're all doomed!" Because the latter three all occurred on Tuesday night, live for all to see on Setanta; and if one was bound to occur sooner or later, two looked at best unlikely, and all three... well, this is one to tell the grandchildren about.
Fifty years of hurt. All right, fifty years of a mild nagging pain somewhere in the vicinity of the gluteus maximus. And it was only our ninth visit in those fifty years. But until United beat the Harriers at the Abbey earlier this season, they had seemed like a team we were destined never to beat; who could forget one of our best performances last season when we ran them ragged at their place for ninety minutes in front of the TV cameras but somehow lost 1-0 to a decidedly offside winner? It seemed then that the U's were destined never to take three points away from Carpet Town.
But this time the portents were good. Kiddie had endured a marathon 13-12 FA Trophy penalty defeat at York last Wednesday, then slumped to a lifeless home defeat to BSP stragglers Northwich on Sunday, while United were fresh from a sixteen-day layoff following their win at Rushden, the first league victory on their travels since August.
Our Gary ran the risk of living up to his 'Tinkerman' tag by making four changes from his last selection and reverting to what appears to be his favourite formation, 4-3-1-2. Out went Messrs Pitt, Challinor, Coulson and the suspended Crow, and in came Scott Rendell, Daryl McMahon and Anthony Tonkin, all recovered from injury, and debut boy, Ipswich loanee Jai Reason (above). McMahon and Reason lined up alongside Paul Carden in a narrow but mobile and combative midfield, Rendell joined Chris Holroyd up front, and Mark Beesley was the link man in between.
For the hosts, strikers Justin Richards and Matthew Barnes-Homer had scored four goals between them in their last three encounters with the U's, while former United loanee Darryl Knights was dropped to the bench from Sunday.
The amber army was in fine voice as United attacked the home end in the first half, and dominated early proceedings against a tired-looking Harriers side for whom harrying looked to be the last thing they wanted to be doing. The U's set out their stall on 4 when Carden's wickedly whipped corner found the head of Phil Bolland. He was unable to keep it under the bar, but that quality of delivery was to be repeated throughout the evening; the hopeful, floated balls of previous matches were replaced by crosses with pace, precision and power.
It was in midfield that the game was being won. In Reason, Carden and McMahon (above), United had three players who were broadly similar, all hard-working, committed and energetic but also able to pass quickly and accurately. With Beesley's movement ahead of them, and the front two's sheer pace and alertness, the Kiddie defence was in for a torrid evening.
And when width was required, full-backs Gleeson and Tonkin were available on occasion to overlap down the flanks.
McMahon found the roof of the net with an outrageous, dipping long-range volley on 14, and three minutes later another Carden corner was this time met by Wayne Hatswell, but he could not climb high enough and his header also flew over the top.
But the visitors were not to be denied. On 20 home keeper Adam Bartlett tried to clear his skipper Mark Creighton's back pass, but saw it charged down by Rendell in the 'D'; the United marksman fought to control the bouncing ball and was shaping to shoot when Keith Lowe blundered in from behind and sent him tumbling to the ground for a stonewall penalty.
Ref Fletcher generously did not award Lowe a card, although a red would have harsh for what was a clumsy attempt to get to the ball rather than a cynical foul, and Rendell brushed himself down and stepped up to coolly send Bartlett the wrong way from the spot. 1-0.
It was his first goal in three games, positively a drought for someone with his phenomenal scoring record, and all this with a protective dressing on his broken right wrist, which judging from the unkempt state of his hair and straggly beard, had prevented him from some bathroom grooming. Mind you, he looked like Fred Astaire compared to Setanta's pitchside summariser, our old chum Chris Hargreaves, who bizarrely appeared to be wearing a blazer straight out of the late, great Patrick McGoohan's 'The Prisoner.'
There was no appreciable response from the subdued Harriers and United continued to dominate, the midfield three equally crisp in tackle and pass, and Holroyd's pace created himself a chance on 28 when he sprinted away from the hapless Lowe, cut inside and blasted over just when he needed to keep a cool head like his strike partner.
On the half hour, however, the U's tore Kiddie apart to double their lead. The impressive Reason drove into the middle and threaded an exquisite through ball which found Rendell and Holroyd level with the hosts' back four. Rendell ran onto it, saw his powerful low shot superbly saved one-handed by Bartlett, and as the rebound dropped out of the sky, Holroyd reacted swiftly to twist and bicycle kick into the empty net before the despairing keeper could recover. 2-0!
Still there was no response from the hosts, and Rendell found the net on 35 from Reason's assist but had already been flagged offside. Three minutes later, however, the Harriers pulled one back with their first shot of the evening.
It was an untidy but well-taken goal: Brian Smikle held the ball up in the box, slipped it to Andy Ferrell, and he waited for Barnes-Homer to come galloping into the box. His arrival seemed to catch the U's defence by surprise as no-one got close enough to stop him blasting his shot past an unsighted Danny Potter into the far corner. 2-1.
The hosts at last seemed galvanised, and enjoyed their first brief spell of pressure with a corner and a few long throws finding the United defence in resolute mood. Kiddie boss Mark Yates was interviewed in the dugout, and astoundingly he seemed to think his team had played well rather than having been comprehensively outplayed. He also admitted to feeling sorry for his players, which may have been a reference to the penalty decision and borderline offside calls for the second goal, but the officials had been proven entirely correct, bless their little black books.
Just before half-time, however, United almost crowned an impressive half with a wonderful flowing move: Reason started it off with a splendid ball down the right for Beesley to chase, Bees' cross from the byline found Holroyd in the middle, and he shielded with his back to goal whilst awaiting the run of McMahon, but Martin Brittain tackled back industriously to get his foot to the ball before his opponent could pull the trigger. A two-goal lead at the interval would not have flattered United in any way.
So where had it all gone right? United had played the same formation at Wrexham, but with the wrong personnel: Robbie Willmott was not suited to one of the midfield berths, Ben Farrell was out of sorts and Danny Crow lacked the pace of Holroyd up front. Tonight was all about square pegs in square holes, playing to the players' strengths, with three midfield men equally adept at tackling, passing and sheer graft, the gifted subtlety of Beesley and the alertness and pace of Rendell and Holroyd. And they were all playing somewhere near their best, confidently in a system they understood and were comfortable in.
Half-time and our TV friends advised us that contrary to what they had originally told us, Uncle Roy's Burton were losing 1-0 to Wrexham and not winning by the same score. We were also allowed to eavesdrop on Yates' team talk, and a more uninspiring, barely intelligible load of waffle it would be hard to beat. The sound in the U's dressing room was mercifully muted.
If the home fans were expecting their team to re-emerge all guns blazing like The Magnificent Eleven they were sorely disappointed as United resumed their grip on the contest, gaining a corner inside the first minute. Not for the last time on the night, Carden and McMahon tried a little short corner routine which resulted in the latter cutting inside and firing for goal, but no matter how many attempts they made during the second half, each one failed by some considerable way. Back to the training ground with that one.
Within a couple of minutes, though, Tonkin had set up Rendell for a volley that was well saved by Bartlett at the far post, and on 52 Holroyd displayed his close skills with a control and volley wide. But United were not be denied, and their two-goal cushion was restored three minutes later.
Another marvellous cross, this time from Gleeson out on the right, dropped like a stone into the heart of the six-yard box, and there was Holroyd to bundle home from point blank range with an unidentified part of his body. Hints of offside, but the goal was thoroughly deserved and was the least United merited.
Richards fed Barnes-Homer a couple of minutes later in a rare break, the Kiddie strikers having been starved of service by United's smothering, industrious midfield, but he could only scuff a trundler wide, then came the news that the great Sir Martin Butler had equalised for Burton nine minutes after coming on as sub. What a legend. They were to go on to win to keep Wrexham behind the U's in the table.
McMahon had a shot blocked by Lowe on 62, then Yates decided to change his wide men, removing Brittain and Smikle in favour of David McDermott and Darryl Knights. They made no appreciable difference, United gaining two more corners, and a further change was forced on the hosts when Lee Baker replaced Craig Armstrong.
McMahon and Carden tried that ruddy short corner again, then there was concern when Rendell collided with Bartlett as the latter collected a through ball and jarred his broken wrist. After a few minutes of wincing and rueful arm-holding, however, he bravely continued as the pain subsided.
Holroyd came agonisingly close to his hat-trick on 74 when a dreadful header by Ferrell from well outside the box intended for Bartlett was latched onto by the quicksilver U's striker, but his goalbound blaster from the edge of the box was superbly pawed over the top by the home keeper.
The hosts' evening was summed up on 77 when Carden fouled Richards a few yards outside the box. Potter lined up his wall but there was a temptingly large gap to aim at to his left; however, Ferrell's free-kick was embarrassingly feeble, his limp shot dribbling low to the wall's left before being easily cleared. I'll bet his set-piece had been brilliant in his mind as made the run-up. Now he just wanted to keep on running out of the stadium.
Still United played their football, retaining shape, discipline and energy, and Our Gary saw no reason to make any changes. Tinker ye not. On 84 Reason picked out Holroyd in the six-yard box, he pulled it back for Rendell but he drove wide of the near post when he should have hit it across goal. A few minutes later a fantastic run and cross from the left by Carden presented Holroyd with the perfect hat-trick chance, but his unchallenged header was aimed too deliberately at the corner of the net when he would have been better off just trying to hit the target, and it flew wide.
McDermott finally managed another shot for the hosts in the last minute, firing into the side netting, and Jon Challinor replaced Beesley for the three added minutes. The match had long been over as a contest, and soon the splendid ref's whistle sounded for the last time and all manner of hoodoos had been voodooed. Brabin was circumspect, Yates appeared suicidal ("men against boys"), Parker had no choice but to praise. Who'd have thunk it.
The tactics, selection and performance had all been spot on, and would have defeated much better opposition than this anaemic flock of sparrows. Do I sense a run gathering? The timing would be perfect. Bring on the Lewes and the Grays.
Statto Corner
There is only one phrase for tonight: At last.
At last United have won at Aggborough, for the first time since their first ever visit on 22nd September 1959 when goals from Eddie Robinson and Phil Hayes clinched a 2-1 Southern League Division One win in front of a crowd of 1,065. Granted, the U's did not play there again until October 2002, but their trips from then until today yielded only two draws and five defeats, including four consecutive 0-1s in their last four visits.
At last United have doubled Kidderminster, for the first time ever, in the eighth season that the clubs have been in the same division. Kiddie have doubled the U's three times in the last seven seasons.
At last United have won on live television this season, at the sixth attempt, following draws at Forest Green and at home to Oxford and defeats at Oxford, Wrexham and at home to Kettering.
At last United have won a game on live television away from the Abbey, for the first time ever. Before this season they drew 1-1 at Southend in 1991, lost 1-0 at Brentford in 1998, and lost at Kidderminster, Histon and Ebbsfleet last term as well as drawing at Burton in the Playoff semi-final first leg. And of course they have lost at the Millennium Stadium in the 2002 LDV Final and in a certain match at Wembley back in May...
Player Ratings
Potter 7. Never particularly stretched by the ineffective Harriers, no chance with the goal.
Gleeson 7. Solid and reliable and enjoyed several useful forays forward.
Bolland 8. Let Barnes-Homer sneak past him for the goal, otherwise immaculate.
Hatswell 8. Always in command.
Tonkin 7. Cruised through the evening with ease.
Reason 8. Impressive debut: strong, hard-working and skilful.
Carden 9. Bundle of energy.
McMahon 8. One of a midfield trio which grabbed the game by the scruff of the neck and never let go.
Beesley 8. Constant menace with intelligent runs and probing passing.
Holroyd 9. Really starting to blossom with pace and skill... and now the goals are starting to flow, too.
Rendell 8. Authoritative line leader and forging a promising partnership with Holroyd.
Challinor 6. Token two-minute appearance.
Match Summary
A tremendous team performance by United saw all sorts of unwanted records broken as Our Gary's favoured 4-3-1-2 formation finally bore fruit, dominating their bogey side from start to finish. A run for the playoffs never looked so promising.
Man of the Match
Paul Carden. Cards led by example with a whirling dervish of a display which left no blade of grass uncovered.
Ref Watch
Fletcher 9. Smiling refs are usually the most irritating, but this guy was exemplary, controlling proceedings with an easy, unobtrusive style that never needed to resort to card-waving. Credit, too, to his assistants, who got several borderline offside decisions spot on.
Becky's World of Wit and Wisdom
"You cannot fight against the future, time in on our side." [Sunderland, 19/9/92]
Hello... Goodbye
Happy 24th birthday to Dan Gleeson. Our England 'C' international full-back has now made 137 appearances, plus 14 as sub, in all competitions and scored the grand total of two goals: the opener in United's 7-0 thrashing of Weymouth in March 2007, and the second in our 3-0 win at Altrincham in September of that year. Must be due another one soon.
David Lill was born on this day in 1947. His twelve goals in the 1972-73 season helped United to their first Football League promotion, but his most important contribution was as foil to top scorer Brian Greenhalgh; a Mark Beesley of his day.
Today's third birthday boy is Roger Avery (1961). The striker's first-team career was restricted to one appearance from the bench in a 4-2 victory at Exeter in December 1977, but he has a place in club history as the first Cambridge-born player to wear the black'n'amber in the League. He was also United's youngest League player until Andy Sinton beat his record five years later.
This day in 1973 saw the first and last United game for one of the club's most obscure players, Martin Binks. After ten runouts for Colchester, the centre-back made his U's debut and swansong in a 3-3 draw at Darlington. It was his last ever League game as he drifted thereafter into non-League in Kent and Essex.
Soundtrack of the Day
Telepathe 'So Fine'
Andrew Bennett
Andrew's previous match reports
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