Thursday 16th October 2008 - Forest Green 2-2 U's: Slow, slow, quick, quick, slow
"High Tempo". Those were the two words, accentuated by a big ring around them, that were scrawled on Gary Brabin's flipchart in the away dressing room at the New Lawn at half-time on Thursday night. Was it a new brand of energy drink that he was recommending? Or a suggestion for the sort of music that he thought his players should be listening to in order to get themselves pumped up for the second half? Or, most likely, his way of reminding his underperforming side that they had to introduce some much-needed energy into their game if they were to get the result they wanted?
One tended to go with the latter option, although the lack of sound afforded to Setanta's fly-on-the-wall camera inside United's inner sanctum made it impossible to tell for certain. Yes, Thursday night was live telly night for Rovers and U's, and yours truly was afforded his first ever chance to see United play on the goggle box, having been in attendance at all eighteen of their previous televised matches going back to 1991.
There was a good attendance in the Supporters Club, which was more than could be said for the chilly New Lawn, where a rather feeble 789 was the recorded figure; still at least it was more than the 751 they got for the visit of Stevenage, and still more than the 740 who saw the team from Nailsworth play at Histon. One hundred and thirty doughty travellers were in attendance at Rovers' compact and bijou away end, and they made a creditable racket for the folks back home.
First impression of Setanta TV was that something was wrong with the colour or contrast; it's a very yellow channel, its chosen colour of identification. A bizarre introduction to the TV coverage saw the two presenters being pictured popping up in various spots among the rolling hills around Nailsworth, as they tried rather over-literally to convey the ups and downs of Forest Green's season. Rovers topped the table briefly in August, but since their 1-0 win in Impington on the thirtieth of that month, they had draw two and lost seven of their next nine matches, sending them plummeting down to fourth from bottom. Injuries were cited as the main cause, of which we were reminded at regular intervals throughout the evening.
Setanta clearly feel they have to do things differently to Sky in order to present some distinctiveness in their coverage, even if what they do isn't actually any better than their rivals. They certainly cannot afford any sort of portable studio, so presenter Steve Bower and 'expert' summariser Paul Parker were stationed about six inches away from a camera in the back of one of the stands, while 'guest' Stuart Fleetwood, resplendent in coat and cosy-looking grey scarf, added his comments from the touchline, either in conversation with that nice blonde girl or responding to questions in an ear-piece, which made him look bizarrely as if he was just talking to himself. That's what failing to make the grade at Charlton does to you.
Other 'innovations' included an introduction to the line-ups by Our Gary and Rovers player-coach Jerry Gill, stationed in front of a magnetic board with eleven counters helpfully positioned in the formations that the team intended to play - Gary couldn't stop fiddling with his - and a chat with Wayne Hatswell in front of a large plasma screen on which they showed his storming free-kick against his old club at the Abbey last season. Mercifully, they refrained from showing the legendary own-goal he scored while playing for Rovers a few years back which is now a staple of YouTube.
Both Gary and Rovers boss Jim Harvey were also to be plagued by regular chats on the touchline during the match, and we were also privileged to be joined by some bloke from Blue Square to tell us all about the matchday odds. Setanta must have hoped to have Sky seething with envy, only they've got their own betting arm, of course...
United stuck to Our Gary's favoured 4-3-3 system, with Danny Crow replacing suspended Lee McEvilly up front, Danny Brown (above) in for the injured Paul Carden in the middle and as skipper, and Anthony Tonkin returned from illness to displace Jordan Collins against his old club. The U's sported their home shirts and white away shorts, in contrast to last season when they were told that would constitute a colour clash and were forced to cobble together that nasty yellow and blue third kit. You do wish the authorities would make their ruddy minds up.
The amber army wasted no time in getting stuck into the anti-Setanta chants within a minute or two of kick-off, until the producer noticed, but their team was noticeably slower out of the blocks. Rovers, playing the passing football their boss always favours, had the first shot through Michael Symons on 5, comfortably gathered by Danny Potter, while first corner went to the visitors on 9 when Robbie Willmott's shot cannoned off Mark Preece. Before it was taken, referee Beck booked home skipper Darren Jones for fouling Crow in the build-up, some commendably sensible officiating for a change.
But as Gary put it in his first pitchside chit-chat, the U's players 'did not look themselves', their passing slipshod, second to too many balls, and once again that dratted formation was simply not functioning at all; the three-man midfield looked outgunned, the forwards were isolated and not linking together, and the narrowness of the system left them vulnerable down both flanks.
Rovers, although doubtless low on confidence, were playing much the better of the two sides, mainly because they could actually find each other with their passes. Alex Lawless fired just over on 13, Dan Gleeson responded with a hopeful shot saved by Ryan Robinson a minute later, then more possession for the hosts saw Jonathan Smith and Lee Fowler shoot high and wide.
Danny Brown was United's first cardee on 16 for a late challenge on Smith, again after the man in black had initially allowed play to continue, and four minutes later the visitors' defence finally conceded after 380 minutes of immaculately clean sheets.
It came, unsurprisingly, from the flank: Lawless beat Tonkin to cross low from the right, and Symons stole ahead of a slumbering Gleeson to slide his shot across the helpless Potter and into the far corner. 1-0.
Mr Parker could barely conceal his delight at Rovers' "deserved" lead, and at this stage it was hard to disagree. The amber hordes could only hope that their heroes, in more need of a wake-up call than Rip Van Winkle, might now be snapped out of their televisual torpor.
Those fiendish tempters at Blue Square flashed up an offer of 5-1 for United to win, although that looked positively generous a couple of minutes later when Simon Clist floated a corner onto the head of Preece and Ben Farrell was forced to clear off the line at the far post.
United, however, began at last to stir their stumps. Hatswell drove an ambitious long-range free-kick wide through a crowded box on 23, Beesley scuffed a feeble shot wide a minute later, then Bees at last made Robinson do some serious work with a tip around the post on 28 and Crow also gave the keeper concern with an effort on 30. With the midfield now looking mobile and getting forward in support of the strikers, the U's were beginning to look like a team which would go top of the table if they won tonight.
Just after the half hour, Lawless committed a horrible two-footed foul on Beesley, at least as bad if not worse than the offence which saw Lee McEvilly dismissed on Saturday, and he was fortunate to see only Setanta yellow. But three minutes later the visitors' renaissance bore fruit with an equaliser.
Jon Challinor clashed with Clist out on the right touchline, the ref awarded a free-kick although his linesman did not flag (or possibly before he could flag), and Willmott's delivery was inch perfect, arrowing into the box for Hatswell to muscle through and power a header home from six yards. 1-1.
It was just about fair on the balance of play, but Parker almost squeaked like a baby's toy in his indignation at the award of the free-kick. In fact he probably continued in the same vein for the next ten minutes in a pitch too high for the human ear to hear.
Having attained parity, United began to sink back into their old ways again. The midfield, led by Brown, started to lose its grip and with the trio outnumbered, the back four could offer little other than hopeful long balls in the general direction of the three unconnected individuals up front.
Rovers returned with a fine shot from Clist on 38, his angled scudder from fifteen yards out superbly tipped around the post by a diving Potter. Three minutes later Clist set up Preece with a free header, but he could only find Potter's welcoming gloves.
Nonetheless, United could well have gone into the break one up when in the last minute Willmott arrowed over another good corner, Phil Bolland rose commandingly, and Robinson did well to sprawl to his right and tip round the post. A level score was just about fair, but surely United could do better in part two.
The soundless pictures from the United dressing room saw a rather subdued-looking group of players having their ears burned by Our Gary in front of his helpfully notated flipchart, many of them just staring at the ground as the boss laid down the law.
Out on the pitch, we were treated to the always gripping Blue Square Challenge, in which a nominee from the home club must try to chip as many balls as possible into a blue square-shaped container on the centre spot from the centre circle line. Rovers' designed driver was a youth team player who managed a creditable five in a minute, three behind the season's leader, Peter Rhoades-Brown of Oxford, who played against the U's several times for Chelsea in the early 1980s. It was however, five more than the one entrant to score a not-so-grand total of nil so far, our very own Wayne Purser, displayed in yellow and black table form for all to see.
With the words 'high tempo' doubtless burned into the brains, United got off to a lively start in part two, as did the fans with a spirited rendition of Horto Majiko. Inside the first minute a give-and-go with Tonkin sent Beesley away down the left channel, but as he entered the box he chose to shoot for the near post and his effort flashed wide and smacked into the back boards. From the TV camera's view it looked as if it had gone in, to hastily curtailed mass celebrations in the Supporters Club.
Rovers responded with a Smith shot blocked by Hatswell, then Gill crossed for Symons to head wide on 51. Smith then fired wide, Willmott gained United a corner with a swift break, and Lawless also missed the target before Smith clattered Tonkin to find his way into the book just before the hour. So far, even Stevens, although United could not be described as anywhere near their best with midfield and forwards too isolated from each other; Farrell and Crow in particular may as well have been invisible for all the contribution they were making.
Then on the hour came another golden opportunity for the visitors. Brown's lofted ball into the box fell for Beesley in the left channel six yards out; Robinson rushed to block his shot, but it squirmed back to the United man almost on the byline to the left of goal. He advanced goalward as the defence rushed back, spurned the cross and tried to squeeze it in at the near post, but Jones had already come across and blocked off the line. Great chance spurned.
Hosts' sub Kaid Mohamed had already enjoyed having his intricate facial topiary exposed in close-up for the cameras and he replaced the injured Smith on 64, but the spotlight was on the visitors when they took the lead with a truly classic goal.
Willmott picked up possession halfway into his own half, and with nothing but positive thoughts ('high tempo!') in his mind he began to sprint upfield. Outpacing his initial marker, he took the ball up to Preece then accelerated again, leaving him for dead so effectively one half-expected him to poke out his tongue and go "Meep! Meep!" Young Robbie stayed cool, though, and as he approached the box with Beesley in support, he spotted Crow haring into the area on the far side, unseen by the Rovers defence. Robbie's cross was exquisite, cutting out the whole FGR defence to present Crow with a header at an open goal, fifteen yards out. It was probably more difficult than it looked, but the ex-Boro striker made no mistake with a firm, decisive header high into the net, followed by an emotional and deserved celebration. 2-1!
Even Parker had to acknowledge the quality of that. In the light of the respective runs which the teams were on, United should now surely be looking to see the game out and push to the top of the league. Canny old fox Harvey responded swiftly, though, removing forwards Symons and Andrew Mangan in favour of two quick players in Les Afful and Curtis McDonald. Rovers began to attack United down the flanks and the channels where United were most vulnerable, the 4-3-3 still leaving vast gaps all over the park, and on 73 they were level.
Willmott conceded a free-kick deep out on the right, Fowler arced it into the box, Bolland won the header but it dropped to Clist; he stabbed the ball forward and it squirmed perfectly to Preece, who stuck out a leg and diverted it first-time into the net from eight yards before Potter could move. 2-2.
Parker all but embarked on a lap of honour as he acclaimed a second "deserved" equaliser, and all of a sudden United were back to their vulnerable, ineffective selves of the early stages. Next minute it almost got even worse when Tonkin unsubtly helped Afful to the ground on the edge of the area, seeing yellow for his pains, but although Clist's free-kick soared over the wall, Potter was equal to it with a tip over.
Our Gary finally made a change on 78, replacing the anonymous Crow with Chris Holroyd but surprisingly sticking with the same malfunctioning formation when surely a two-winger system with the trickery and pace of Felino Jardim would have unlocked a FGR defence which had conceded seventeen goals in its previous six games.
There was some unpleasantness a minute later when Fowler thrust his elbow into Brown's face in going for a header - it looked even worse and more deliberate in slow motion - and he was fortunate to only receive yellow for the United skipper's pains. Mr Parker thought he was "just trying to play the ball"!
Rovers went for the win at pace as the U's continued to look disjointed and unconvincing. Mohamed had a shot blocked by Bolland on 81, Clist crossed for Jones to nod wide a minute later, but when Our Gary was interviewed again on the touchline, he maintained that United had been "the better team by far". I can only assume he was wearing invisible rose-tinted glasses.
His charges did manage a couple more forays forward in the closing minutes, however, Gleeson blazing hopelessly over when he should have passed, then a Willmott break set up Beesley for a close-range shot that was blocked away for a corner. But the danger, at both ends, had passed.
Our Gary seemed happy with the point, and there is no doubt that Rovers are better than their league position might suggest. But pretenders to the promotion throne like United should really look to be winning games like this, one up against a weakened opposition on a dreadful run, even if they are playing a team they have never beaten away on the telly, on which they have never won away.
And how much longer will he persevere with a formation which is riddled with so many weaknesses and has brought the team results despite its application rather than because of it? Maybe it will all come good and click in the next match and Gary's vision will be vindicated. But then we're only playing Boston. Stay tuned, viewers, there might be a little interference...
Statto Corner
Tonight's attendance of 789 was the third lowest for a Conference game involving United, beaten for paucity only by Droylsden's 634 (5th April 2008) and Stafford's 741 (13th October 2007). The only other sub-1,000 league crowds over the last three and a bit seasons have been at Canvey Island (842), Farsley (868) and Altrincham (891 and 982).
The LDV Vans Trophy and its predecessors have 'attracted' several three-figure attendances over the years, but the only such crowd during United's 35-year stay in the Football League was 588 on a Tuesday afternoon in Rochdale on 5th February 1974.
In ten attempts, United have never won a match that was transmitted live on television away from the Abbey. From their first ever attempt at Southend on 22nd December 1991 through one other Football League game, the 2002 LDV Final and seven Conference games, including of course one at Wembley, they have only even managed three draws.
As far as home games go, they had to wait until their first transmitted Conference game versus Hereford in August 2005 for their first 'live' victory. Total record at the Abbey is five wins, two draws and two defeats.
The U's also await their first win away to Forest Green, now having drawn two and lost two. In fact United have defeated Rovers only once ever, 2-0 at the Abbey last season after two draws in previous terms. Goals came from Wayne Hatswell (THAT forty-yard free-kick) and an o.g. from Mark Preece.
Player Ratings
Potter 7. Nothing he could do about the goals, and produced the regulation superb save or two along the way.
Gleeson 6. Not able to reproduce the splendid form he has shown recently.
Bolland 7. Fairly average by his own high standard.
Hatswell 8. Most consistent of them all.
Tonkin 6. Merely adequate when he can do so much better.
Farrell 5. A grave disappointment, disappearing completely for long periods, although the system hardly helped.
Brown 6. Kept it simple, but at times too simple, and failed to exercise enough influence on the midfield.
Challinor 6. Not bad without doing anything special.
Beesley 7. Enjoyed a decent first hour, although faded considerably towards the end.
Willmott 8. Run and cross of the season, and easily the most lively United player on the park. Quality crossing throughout.
Crow 6. Wandered lonely as a lost lamb for most of the game. Extra mark for a neat goal.
Holroyd 5. Did little other than run up several blind alleys and give the ball away.
Match Summary
A curate's egg of a performance won United a hard-fought draw with struggling Forest Green, but the merits of Our Gary's 4-3-3 system remain dubious to many. It's all very nice to be picking up points without playing particularly well, but it would be even nicer to be, well, playing particularly well...
Man of the Match
Robbie Willmott. A shining shooting star in a sky full of dull grey clouds.
Ref Watch
Beck 8. Ran the game smoothly and efficiently, played the advantage well and booked players only when necessary. What is this guy doing in the Conference??
Becky's World of Wit and Wisdom
"A few fly bites cannot stop a spirited horse." [Swindon, 25/1/92]
Hello... Goodbye
Today's birthday boy is Roy McDonough (1958). A striker who defined the word 'hard,' he holds the British record for most sendings-off in a career (21), including thirteen in the League. However, he avoided the red card in his one season at the Abbey, 1984-85, in which he scored five times in 32 appearances. He also scored four times against the U's in his career, twice each for Southend and Colchester.
He took Colchester out of the Conference as player-manager in 1992, pipping Martin O'Neill's Wycombe Wanderers on goal difference. He delighted in winding O'Neill up, and when Colchester played Wycombe in the Bob Lord Trophy that season, he played everyone out of position, putting his defenders up front and playing himself at sweeper. Remarkably, his back-to-front team won 6-2, and although the Conference was itching to fine them, they could not because the full first team had played!
There was one debut boy on this day. Mark Flatts was a quick little winger on loan from Arsenal who first played for the U's on 16th October 1993 in a 1-0 win at home to Hartlepool. He scored the winner in his second game, a 3-2 win at Barnet, but played only three more times before returning to Highbury. He never really made the grade in North London, and after a few more loan spells, he drifted into non-League with Kettering and Bishop's Stortford. He has recently turned up, however, in Sky's Six-a-Side Masters tournament in an Arsenal shirt alongside ex-U's legend Danny O'Shea. Presumably Dennis Bergkamp was unavailable.
Soundtrack of the Day
Antony & The Johnsons 'Shake That Devil'
Andrew Bennett
Andrew's previous match reports
More Match Photos
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